Master 211: The extra mile
There were only supposed to be three or four benches. It was only supposed to take a couple hours. But when we got there, there were thirteen benches and it ended up taking about nine hours to complete the job.
--
For the past two years, the church I attend has been going through a process of self-evaluation and exploration. Our goal is to become more intentionally and effectively engaged in our community. Part of that process has involved identifying a few key places where we can concentrate our time, energy, and resources into building long-term, stable, positive, and helpful relationships. Early in the summer we talked about possibly partnering with one of the local elementary schools. With the many recent teacher lay-offs and budget cuts, schools are struggling to provide quality education to students. Could we come alongside of one of our schools and help to meet some of the lack?
Through one of our church members, we connected with one school in our area and asked them how we could be of help to them. One of the items on their list: the school had about twenty lunch tables that were in serious need of repainting. So on one Saturday, early in the summer, about thirty people showed up from the church to sand, prime, and paint those lunch tables. I think it took us about four hours to do the job. It was great to see all the people and resources coming together to accomplish this task; and the whole experience was very positive.
About three weeks ago, our contact at the school came to us with a few more requests. The new stock in the teacher supply room at the school needed to be organized; could some volunteers come to help with that? And there were also three or four free-standing wooden benches that needed to painted--just like the lunch tables had been. Our contact actually came to me and asked if I could put together a group of volunteers from my Sunday school class to take care of the benches. They (i.e. the benches) would need to be sanded, primed, and painted; but there were only three or four and it would take a couple hours at most. So I gathered a group of five guys, including myself, and we agreed to meet at the elementary school on the following Friday morning to take care of these benches.
On Friday morning, I walked out into the school quad with our contact and we found eleven benches assembled on the blacktop. As our group of volunteers arrived, a school staff person gave us a note from the custodians telling us where we could find two other benches at different parts of the campus. There were five of us there to work, but there was only one electric hand-sander and one electric belt sander. And thirteen long wooden benches.
Now stop for a moment and think to yourself: how would you have felt in that situation? How would you feel if you had volunteered to re-paint three or four benches and were suddenly confronted with thirteen? How would you feel knowing that you had recruited a group of guys to work--telling them that the task would only take a couple hours--and now you were looking at thirteen long wooden benches?
--
Right away, I got on the phone with another church member I knew, who was a carpenter and had a lot of wood-working tools. Within twenty minutes he drove over with a case containing two more hand sanders, one belt sander, lots of extra sand paper, and extra extension cords. That took care of our equipment needs: five volunteers, five electric sanders; and the sanding was the part that was going to take the longest time. But I could tell that the job was still going to take longer than any of us had expected.
Then, as I was walking back toward the quad with the equipment I noticed one of the teachers walking in my direction. She waved her hand. I couldn't tell at first whether she was heading for me or just going to pass me by. She didn't pass me by. She stopped me and introduced herself; and she asked whether I was part of the church group that had come to paint the benches. I said that I was. And she proceeded to ask me whether it would be too much trouble for us to also paint a couple cabinets of hers. She had two cabinets that badly needed to be repainted--the old paint was peeling off most of the top and front of each--and when she had asked a custodian about it, he had mentioned that we might be able to help.
--
Now stop and think to yourself, again: how would you have felt in that situation? It's now 10:00 in the morning and shaping up to be a really hot day. You were expecting to be here for a couple hours but now it looks like you'll be here for quite a bit longer. There are thirteen benches to be sanded and primed and painted. Your aware that the volunteers that you recruited were only expecting to be here for a couple hours. And now this teacher is coming to you and wants to add a few more items to the list.
I posed this question to a group of church leaders and many of them admitted that they would have probably felt a bit used and taken advantage of. How would you have felt in that situation?
--
The interesting thing, for me, about that whole situation is that I didn't feel used. I didn't feel taken advantage of. I didn't feel like my day had been spoiled. I didn't resent this teacher for asking this favor of us. There was no impulse in me to roll my eyes or urge to groan in frustration. In fact, what was at the forefront of my mind at that moment was the overwhelming sense of how very much I wanted to help this teacher.
This desire to help that I felt was not something that I needed to conjure or dig for from deep inside myself. I didn't need to "look at the bright side" or take any time to collect my composure. I didn't have to rehearse lines in my mind about it being "more blessed to give," etc., etc. The desire and impulse to help came naturally.
In fact, the one thing that frustrated me most in that situation was the awareness that I had of my responsibility to the volunteers that I recruited. I needed to respect their time and could not just volunteer them to stay for even longer when they had already been hit with way more work than they had expected. So even as everything inside of me was wanting to say, "YES! YES! YES!" to this woman's request, I had to hold back and say things like, "We'll get to it if we can," "We'll try to take care of it after we've taken care of the benches."
Have you ever been frustrated in quite that way? Have you ever been frustrated because you wanted to help so badly but were constrained by one thing or another? Or do you find that you're usually frustrated because you want to help less and are being asked to help more?
Sometimes, within Christian circles, the following question is posed: If everybody in the church were just like you, what would the church look like? Usually this is a pretty sobering question. Most of us are aware that, while there are some areas in which we are very strong, there are other areas in which we are very weak--and if the whole church were deficient in those same areas, it would be in pretty sorry shape. But at that moment, I think, I would have been happy to have a church full of people just like me. At that moment, a church with people just like me would have been ready to offer no end of time and work and resources in order to help those teachers. A church with people just like me would have gone to the task joyfully and enthusiastically.
And before continuing, I do have to say that I was thoroughly impressed with the group of guys who came out to work. They were all surprised, understandably, to learn that our work load had almost quadrupled. But they all took up the task. They worked hard for almost six hours, through the hottest part of the day, without complaining. The mother of two of the guys admitted to me, later, that she had begun to wonder seriously about where her sons had gotten to after three or four hours had passed. They had been out there in the sun, working on those benches. And this just makes the question more pointed. Would you have been willing to stay the extra couple hours to try and see the job done? Or would you have made some excuse to try and get out of the work? Would you have poured yourself into the task? Or would you only have reluctantly gone through the motions?
--
Now why do I tell this story? So that you will all be impressed by my generous spirit? So that you will feel guilty because you're not as eager to help as I was? No. I tell this story because it exemplifies a certain way of living, and I want to put that way of living on display and invite you into it.
One of the things that most struck me that morning was how very good it was to be out there and to be feeling the way that I was. It really was good. Imagine the alternative. I could have been filled with resentment and frustration. I could have been 'barely holding it together' as this woman laid one more task on my plate. But none of that was there. I didn't have to suppress feelings of exasperation. The natural impulse within me was to reach out to this woman and to the school with generosity. And that natural impulse within me was so good, and so much better than any of the alternatives.
Now can you imagine being like that all the time? Can you imagine what it would be like to be filled with this generous spirit all the time? Would you want to be that kind of person? I do. The truth is that I'm not always as enthusiastic and generous as I was on that morning. I tend to think of myself as a pretty caring and generous guy, but I recognize that I'm not like that all the time. And I also recognize that life would be so much better if I could be that way all the time.
What about you? Now there are a number of questions that you might have at this point. Some of you might wonder whether it really would be good to be so generous all of the time. Some of you might worry that that would just lead to people taking advantage of you. Some of you might wonder whether it is even possible to be filled with such a generous spirit all of the time. There are also, of course, plenty of legitimate questions about boundaries and how to meet different obligations. (Remember, even I had to deal with the fact that I had a responsibility to the people that I had recruited.) But for just a moment, I would like to invite you to get away from all of these distractions and all of the little details that might immediately try to choke out and extinguish the spark of an idea in your mind. What if... What if you could be that generous all the time? Wouldn't that be wonderful?
--
Let me suggest to you that it actually is possible to be that generous. Jesus is the living proof. And just in case you're tempted to think that we could never do what Jesus did, let me remind you that He's given all of His followers the gift of the Holy Spirit. If you think it can't be done, then you have to explain why the Holy Spirit's power is limited in this particular area.
Now remember, pointing out that it's possible doesn't guarantee that it will happen to everyone. In the first place, you have to want it. And there are plenty of people, even in the church, who don't really want to be generous. They'll say that we should 'love our enemies,' and 'give to anyone who asks of you,' but they don't really believe that it's possible--and they get really nervous when anyone talks about actually doing it--and they'll fight you tooth and nail if you try and bring them around. And their basic problem is that they don't believe it's possible and they don't believe it would be a really good thing. They're focusing on the danger of being taken advantage of and they're worried about setting up boundaries and they don't appreciate how fantastically good it really is to be generous. [As I reread this, before posting, it does seem a bit strong. I'll just invite you to really think about it.] That's why I told this story. To try and give you just a little sense of how fantastically good it is to be generous. The first step, then, is to decide whether you want it.
Actually getting from where you are now to being that really generous person will require a process. I'm not going to go into the details of that now, in part because the process must be one that is tailored specifically to who you are, who God has made you to be, the character of your life and journey up to this point, and the particular place that God has you right now. Individuals are free to contact me if they have questions along these lines. For now, I just want you to think about what it would be like to be that person.
--
As we wrap things up here, consider this invitation from Jesus: "You have heard that it was said, 'An eye for an eye, and a tooth for a tooth.' But I say to you, do not resist him who is evil; but whoever slaps you on your right cheek, turn to him the other also. And if anyone wants to sue you, and take your shirt, let him have your coat also. And whoever shall force you to go one mile, go with him two. Give to him who asks of you, and do not turn away from him who wants to borrow from you." (Matthew 5:38-42)
Many would count these among Jesus' hard sayings, but I think it really would be good if you would think of them as an invitation. Consider the line: "And whoever shall force you to go one mile, go with him two." Understand that according to Roman law, at that time, a Roman soldier could compel a non-Roman to carry his pack and burden for one mile. It's quite understandable that people would try to avoid this and resent being called upon to do it. Imagine, then, how it might be if you were traveling on business from one town to another and a Roman soldier was passing in the opposite direction and stopped you and ordered you to carry his pack for a mile. It would be quite understandable if you resented the soldier and took to the task grudgingly--knowing that it was leading you away from your own work and what you needed to accomplish.
But, consider, could you imagine yourself being at all different in that situation? Could you imagine actually talking to this Roman soldier over your one-mile journey--perhaps learning that he'd been walking for seven or eight miles already that day. Could you imagine taking the time to notice the weariness on his face, the heaviness in his steps, and the stoop in his shoulders. Could you imagine actually becoming interested in who this soldier is, what troubles he's faced, how much he misses his family, etc. And when you reach the end of the mile and he tells you to put the pack down and go on your way, could you imagine actually saying, "I wouldn't mind helping you along a bit farther"? Could you imagine that? Wouldn't that be better than walking an entire mile filled with resentment and bitterness and frustration? Oh, sure, you may have missed an important business meeting, you might be late getting home tonight, but isn't there anything in your heart that feels the tug and says, helping this person is the most important thing that I can do right now. Can you imagine?
Think about it.
--
God is in this place,
And that reality, seen and understood by the grace of God in Christ Jesus through the work of the Holy Spirit, makes all the difference in the world.
--
For the past two years, the church I attend has been going through a process of self-evaluation and exploration. Our goal is to become more intentionally and effectively engaged in our community. Part of that process has involved identifying a few key places where we can concentrate our time, energy, and resources into building long-term, stable, positive, and helpful relationships. Early in the summer we talked about possibly partnering with one of the local elementary schools. With the many recent teacher lay-offs and budget cuts, schools are struggling to provide quality education to students. Could we come alongside of one of our schools and help to meet some of the lack?
Through one of our church members, we connected with one school in our area and asked them how we could be of help to them. One of the items on their list: the school had about twenty lunch tables that were in serious need of repainting. So on one Saturday, early in the summer, about thirty people showed up from the church to sand, prime, and paint those lunch tables. I think it took us about four hours to do the job. It was great to see all the people and resources coming together to accomplish this task; and the whole experience was very positive.
About three weeks ago, our contact at the school came to us with a few more requests. The new stock in the teacher supply room at the school needed to be organized; could some volunteers come to help with that? And there were also three or four free-standing wooden benches that needed to painted--just like the lunch tables had been. Our contact actually came to me and asked if I could put together a group of volunteers from my Sunday school class to take care of the benches. They (i.e. the benches) would need to be sanded, primed, and painted; but there were only three or four and it would take a couple hours at most. So I gathered a group of five guys, including myself, and we agreed to meet at the elementary school on the following Friday morning to take care of these benches.
On Friday morning, I walked out into the school quad with our contact and we found eleven benches assembled on the blacktop. As our group of volunteers arrived, a school staff person gave us a note from the custodians telling us where we could find two other benches at different parts of the campus. There were five of us there to work, but there was only one electric hand-sander and one electric belt sander. And thirteen long wooden benches.
Now stop for a moment and think to yourself: how would you have felt in that situation? How would you feel if you had volunteered to re-paint three or four benches and were suddenly confronted with thirteen? How would you feel knowing that you had recruited a group of guys to work--telling them that the task would only take a couple hours--and now you were looking at thirteen long wooden benches?
--
Right away, I got on the phone with another church member I knew, who was a carpenter and had a lot of wood-working tools. Within twenty minutes he drove over with a case containing two more hand sanders, one belt sander, lots of extra sand paper, and extra extension cords. That took care of our equipment needs: five volunteers, five electric sanders; and the sanding was the part that was going to take the longest time. But I could tell that the job was still going to take longer than any of us had expected.
Then, as I was walking back toward the quad with the equipment I noticed one of the teachers walking in my direction. She waved her hand. I couldn't tell at first whether she was heading for me or just going to pass me by. She didn't pass me by. She stopped me and introduced herself; and she asked whether I was part of the church group that had come to paint the benches. I said that I was. And she proceeded to ask me whether it would be too much trouble for us to also paint a couple cabinets of hers. She had two cabinets that badly needed to be repainted--the old paint was peeling off most of the top and front of each--and when she had asked a custodian about it, he had mentioned that we might be able to help.
--
Now stop and think to yourself, again: how would you have felt in that situation? It's now 10:00 in the morning and shaping up to be a really hot day. You were expecting to be here for a couple hours but now it looks like you'll be here for quite a bit longer. There are thirteen benches to be sanded and primed and painted. Your aware that the volunteers that you recruited were only expecting to be here for a couple hours. And now this teacher is coming to you and wants to add a few more items to the list.
I posed this question to a group of church leaders and many of them admitted that they would have probably felt a bit used and taken advantage of. How would you have felt in that situation?
--
The interesting thing, for me, about that whole situation is that I didn't feel used. I didn't feel taken advantage of. I didn't feel like my day had been spoiled. I didn't resent this teacher for asking this favor of us. There was no impulse in me to roll my eyes or urge to groan in frustration. In fact, what was at the forefront of my mind at that moment was the overwhelming sense of how very much I wanted to help this teacher.
This desire to help that I felt was not something that I needed to conjure or dig for from deep inside myself. I didn't need to "look at the bright side" or take any time to collect my composure. I didn't have to rehearse lines in my mind about it being "more blessed to give," etc., etc. The desire and impulse to help came naturally.
In fact, the one thing that frustrated me most in that situation was the awareness that I had of my responsibility to the volunteers that I recruited. I needed to respect their time and could not just volunteer them to stay for even longer when they had already been hit with way more work than they had expected. So even as everything inside of me was wanting to say, "YES! YES! YES!" to this woman's request, I had to hold back and say things like, "We'll get to it if we can," "We'll try to take care of it after we've taken care of the benches."
Have you ever been frustrated in quite that way? Have you ever been frustrated because you wanted to help so badly but were constrained by one thing or another? Or do you find that you're usually frustrated because you want to help less and are being asked to help more?
Sometimes, within Christian circles, the following question is posed: If everybody in the church were just like you, what would the church look like? Usually this is a pretty sobering question. Most of us are aware that, while there are some areas in which we are very strong, there are other areas in which we are very weak--and if the whole church were deficient in those same areas, it would be in pretty sorry shape. But at that moment, I think, I would have been happy to have a church full of people just like me. At that moment, a church with people just like me would have been ready to offer no end of time and work and resources in order to help those teachers. A church with people just like me would have gone to the task joyfully and enthusiastically.
And before continuing, I do have to say that I was thoroughly impressed with the group of guys who came out to work. They were all surprised, understandably, to learn that our work load had almost quadrupled. But they all took up the task. They worked hard for almost six hours, through the hottest part of the day, without complaining. The mother of two of the guys admitted to me, later, that she had begun to wonder seriously about where her sons had gotten to after three or four hours had passed. They had been out there in the sun, working on those benches. And this just makes the question more pointed. Would you have been willing to stay the extra couple hours to try and see the job done? Or would you have made some excuse to try and get out of the work? Would you have poured yourself into the task? Or would you only have reluctantly gone through the motions?
--
Now why do I tell this story? So that you will all be impressed by my generous spirit? So that you will feel guilty because you're not as eager to help as I was? No. I tell this story because it exemplifies a certain way of living, and I want to put that way of living on display and invite you into it.
One of the things that most struck me that morning was how very good it was to be out there and to be feeling the way that I was. It really was good. Imagine the alternative. I could have been filled with resentment and frustration. I could have been 'barely holding it together' as this woman laid one more task on my plate. But none of that was there. I didn't have to suppress feelings of exasperation. The natural impulse within me was to reach out to this woman and to the school with generosity. And that natural impulse within me was so good, and so much better than any of the alternatives.
Now can you imagine being like that all the time? Can you imagine what it would be like to be filled with this generous spirit all the time? Would you want to be that kind of person? I do. The truth is that I'm not always as enthusiastic and generous as I was on that morning. I tend to think of myself as a pretty caring and generous guy, but I recognize that I'm not like that all the time. And I also recognize that life would be so much better if I could be that way all the time.
What about you? Now there are a number of questions that you might have at this point. Some of you might wonder whether it really would be good to be so generous all of the time. Some of you might worry that that would just lead to people taking advantage of you. Some of you might wonder whether it is even possible to be filled with such a generous spirit all of the time. There are also, of course, plenty of legitimate questions about boundaries and how to meet different obligations. (Remember, even I had to deal with the fact that I had a responsibility to the people that I had recruited.) But for just a moment, I would like to invite you to get away from all of these distractions and all of the little details that might immediately try to choke out and extinguish the spark of an idea in your mind. What if... What if you could be that generous all the time? Wouldn't that be wonderful?
--
Let me suggest to you that it actually is possible to be that generous. Jesus is the living proof. And just in case you're tempted to think that we could never do what Jesus did, let me remind you that He's given all of His followers the gift of the Holy Spirit. If you think it can't be done, then you have to explain why the Holy Spirit's power is limited in this particular area.
Now remember, pointing out that it's possible doesn't guarantee that it will happen to everyone. In the first place, you have to want it. And there are plenty of people, even in the church, who don't really want to be generous. They'll say that we should 'love our enemies,' and 'give to anyone who asks of you,' but they don't really believe that it's possible--and they get really nervous when anyone talks about actually doing it--and they'll fight you tooth and nail if you try and bring them around. And their basic problem is that they don't believe it's possible and they don't believe it would be a really good thing. They're focusing on the danger of being taken advantage of and they're worried about setting up boundaries and they don't appreciate how fantastically good it really is to be generous. [As I reread this, before posting, it does seem a bit strong. I'll just invite you to really think about it.] That's why I told this story. To try and give you just a little sense of how fantastically good it is to be generous. The first step, then, is to decide whether you want it.
Actually getting from where you are now to being that really generous person will require a process. I'm not going to go into the details of that now, in part because the process must be one that is tailored specifically to who you are, who God has made you to be, the character of your life and journey up to this point, and the particular place that God has you right now. Individuals are free to contact me if they have questions along these lines. For now, I just want you to think about what it would be like to be that person.
--
As we wrap things up here, consider this invitation from Jesus: "You have heard that it was said, 'An eye for an eye, and a tooth for a tooth.' But I say to you, do not resist him who is evil; but whoever slaps you on your right cheek, turn to him the other also. And if anyone wants to sue you, and take your shirt, let him have your coat also. And whoever shall force you to go one mile, go with him two. Give to him who asks of you, and do not turn away from him who wants to borrow from you." (Matthew 5:38-42)
Many would count these among Jesus' hard sayings, but I think it really would be good if you would think of them as an invitation. Consider the line: "And whoever shall force you to go one mile, go with him two." Understand that according to Roman law, at that time, a Roman soldier could compel a non-Roman to carry his pack and burden for one mile. It's quite understandable that people would try to avoid this and resent being called upon to do it. Imagine, then, how it might be if you were traveling on business from one town to another and a Roman soldier was passing in the opposite direction and stopped you and ordered you to carry his pack for a mile. It would be quite understandable if you resented the soldier and took to the task grudgingly--knowing that it was leading you away from your own work and what you needed to accomplish.
But, consider, could you imagine yourself being at all different in that situation? Could you imagine actually talking to this Roman soldier over your one-mile journey--perhaps learning that he'd been walking for seven or eight miles already that day. Could you imagine taking the time to notice the weariness on his face, the heaviness in his steps, and the stoop in his shoulders. Could you imagine actually becoming interested in who this soldier is, what troubles he's faced, how much he misses his family, etc. And when you reach the end of the mile and he tells you to put the pack down and go on your way, could you imagine actually saying, "I wouldn't mind helping you along a bit farther"? Could you imagine that? Wouldn't that be better than walking an entire mile filled with resentment and bitterness and frustration? Oh, sure, you may have missed an important business meeting, you might be late getting home tonight, but isn't there anything in your heart that feels the tug and says, helping this person is the most important thing that I can do right now. Can you imagine?
Think about it.
--
God is in this place,
And that reality, seen and understood by the grace of God in Christ Jesus through the work of the Holy Spirit, makes all the difference in the world.
posted by Metaphysician_delta | 9:29 AM
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